Stacy Lois Oliver’s obituary has been going viral, because of all the life lessons it includes. Her husband of 21 years Jeff Oliver said she chose to write her own obituary after doctors informed her there was no cure for the progressive neurodegenerative disorder and she had to get her thoughts out while she still could.

 

From Stacy: I’ve never done anything the “normal” or “regular” way. I thought “why not write my own obituary and continue this kind of behavior until the end?” My mom always said “if I’m not going to blow my own horn no one else will.” Sooo, toot toot. I don’t want a list of whom I’m related to that doesn’t say a thing about my life and who’s really in it.

My full name is Stacy Lois Oliver. I was born August, 30, 1968. The last day of the Democratic Convention in Chicago, Illinois. I’m a lifelong Chicagoan, even though we moved to Skokie in 2015 to buy our gingerbread house. I’ve worn many hats, professionally: I’ve done improv, worked at Henri Bendel when it was here, sang in clubs and cabarets, and for 21 years worked at Northwestern University. In-between for fun I made beaded jewelry, belly-danced and hula-danced, sewed, baked, did some gardening, loved participating at my Temple Beth Israel, and enjoyed plays and musicals.

While I’m on the topic of love and fun. I was lucky enough to marry Jeff October 9, 1999, truly my best friend and the love of my life. He’s kind, likes a pun, has a super-distinctive laugh (he gets his giggle on every morning watching funny shows), and is so handsome (he grew his beard for me before we were married and always kept it.) He’d take me anywhere I wanted to go and went to all the events I planned. I was real with him and forever grateful that he shared his life with me.

My mom was Fern Siegel and she died November 17, 2015. We had a complicated relationship, but we loved each other deeply and fiercely. She kept every, I mean every, card from me. There are also the fun and caring ladies of Temple Beth Israel Sisterhood.

Everyone should have a science and posse team: Susanne, Linda, and Jill. My Kati, my soul sister. Tracy, Susie, Betsy, Jennifer, Pat (my home nurse and friend), Connie, Emily, and the list goes on. Friends were like flowers, different, colorful in their own way, and brought their own special beauty to my life. Bridget, my Bridget, I carry you around in my pocket. Cindy and Chris, I can’t imagine a life without you and your family being in it. Mary, so beautiful, inside and out, Tootsie’s best friend, your visits from Atlanta meant the world to me. Then there is Spike. Talented, sweet, silly, my stepson Spike. May music always surround you and your dreams come true. I loved you as if you were my own. Finally, Gina and David. David was our Handy Husband. He was our funny bunny and SO smart. My little Einstein, you never knew what King David would say next. Finally, Gina is the sister I dreamed of having. She and I were like Lucy and Ethel. Then the whole Berardesco family adopted me and I had a big, Italian family in New Jersey. Lisa, Di, and Mommy(2), Bob, GM, you taught me what family could be.

May I just say this. I’m not telling you what to do, but I am telling you what to do. Stop worrying about your weight, go live, be, do. Smile, people don’t get to feel them enough. Enjoy the moment, it might not come again. If you want to do it, give something a try, try it, taste it, go there. Take it from me, I’m dead. Eat the danish, go to the show, laugh out loud. Love one another and you’ll never know what you’ll find.

 

Source: LEGACY